Blog Cafe

Graceful Perseverance: Where is God?

Posted January 17th, 2016 @ 01:01pm

Welcome back to my weekly blogs everyone! Cup of coffeeTo date, there are 187,858 followers of my faith based blogs, how exciting leading into 2016. It is my hope that everyone had a very blessed holiday season and a happy new year! It's January, a new year, a new season the Lord has blessed upon each of us. How awesome that He has given us another year to do His work. What is it that the Lord has put upon your heart to do for His glory this year? How will your relationship grow with the Lord, our Savior, this next year? How will you praise Him? Will you let Him into your life for the first time or continue to grow your relationship with Him? Will you become a light in this jaded world? These are my words of encouragement for you today.

Here's how the Lord wrapped up this past year in my life. As a self-publishing author and speaker since 2003, I just published my 6th book (December 2015), a faith based book you can curl up with in your favorite chair in front of the fireplace, with lit candles all around you to add to the ambiance to set the mood to read a powerful testimony of conviction of Where is God? a faith and hope based book of encouragement.January blog 2016

In this book I have expressed my innermost feelings about various personal issues that have permeated my life. I have experienced many traumas that most people have never experienced and perhaps, may never in their lifetime.  Yet, with my tragedies behind me, I have come to be a blessed child in Christ Jesus.  I confess to you today, I stand at the foot of the cross because He is my light, my strength, my spirit and where hope is found even in the darkest and stormiest corners of my life. I turn to the cross to calm my fears and my contention. The power of the cross fills the depths of me with peace and brings me comfort because it is when I stand at the foot of the cross I find myself enriched by the love of Christ. The power of the cross is His gift of love and righteousness.IMG_20150822_192923804

There are six parts to this book, each filled with a power message. Each page is filled with inspiration for all of us, followed by chapter scripture relative to each section of the book. In each chapter, I reveal a message from my soul all of us need to embrace. I chose not to walk the path of destruction. I love Christ very deeply and as a result wish to share my deep-rooted relationship with all of you. I know all too well that God is alive, and I am inspiring each of us to turn to Him, to trust Him, and to follow His plan for our lives. I inspire you to vehemently turn away from your own understanding and probably false perceptions and your worldly biased opinions of our secular society and turn to the Lord today.

Until next week's blog, go to to see my other faith based books or email me at as we are all in this thing called life together. Each week and with each book, it is my intent to encourage each of you, pray for all and continue to change lives one book at a time.

May God bless you and keep you. May His face shine upon you and give you grace. May you go about your day and everything you do, you do in the name of our Lord and Savior,



Other books published by Debra Pauli:

Where is God?, a testimony of conviction

Once Upon a Man, frog or prince

Saving 3 Leaves on a Tree, me, myself and I (published TBD)

Why We Cry for a Soul Set Free, in loving memory of Bryce Lee

“...and then there was LIGHT”, my spiritual cleansing (2nd Edition)

A Survivor’s Closet, how my memories as a little girl became the diary of one of the most horrific, severe child abuse stories in Missouri history


Debra's self-publishing timeline: 2015, 2013, 2006, 2005, 2004, 2003

5books 2016

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Graceful Perseverance: "Oola" - The Best Possible Me

Posted May 31st, 2015 @ 10:05am

Welcome back to my weekly blog café, everyone! I've been away for a few weeks restructuring my personal life a bit. In the month of May I moved into a beautiful new condo. My office is now back online and fully operational so that I can pick up where I left off with my blogs.

I am so thrilled to see so many followers reading and commenting on these powerful topics. It is my prayer that you continue to return for more inspirational enlightenment each week and meeting you right where you are today in your life! My blog stats have gone through the roof in the past few years. From 52 followers the first week of blogging, today it has reached 149,507 followers. Cup of coffeeMy weekly blog topics have gone viral, which tells me to keep feeding you, writing, sharing and posting what many of you are thirsty for, what many of you are asking for. This is a really big universe created by the Master's hands. If I can be His vessel in cyberspace that will impact the lives of thousands, then I have every reason to believe this blogging is my calling! This blogging is my personal quest! I've been extremely blessed with the chance to help others find their greatest gifts from the inside out. So let's do it!

Many of us are craving change, but most are resistant only because of the endless "fear-based thoughts" we carry around like bricks on our shoulders. Many of you desire a better life and are ready to transform to the next level, the next season of your lives, but you are not sure of the "how’s" to get there. We are all "one!" We're all divinely connected. We're all in this thing called life together! If what I experience in the "light" of my life, and what I experience in the "darkness" of my life, transforms me to be the best me possible, or what Amy Hughes from NYC calls "oola," then I want to be courageous enough to share with you every evolving experience I've encountered that has helped me reach my "oola" (the best me possible).

According to Amy Hughes from New York City, oo·la™ [oo-luh] is a noun. It’s a state of “Awesomeness.” It's when we are "In the Zone." It is when our lives are balanced and we are growing in all 7 key areas of life [fitness . financial . family . field . faith . friends . fun]. She says, "It is 20 bucks in your couch, all green lights, Christmas bonus in July, every tweet re-tweeted, skinny jeans fit . . . good." I believe we are all here to help each other evolve and grow into our best “Oola.”

Is it not my mission while I'm here to be the victor over every the trial and tribulation I experience, so I can grow and balance each and every day and so I can be the best possible me? Body, spirit, mind BalanceIt’s a part of my mission to pass every test my Heavenly Father puts before me. I've been called to be a living testimony to the "how’s" of my life that have been foolproof and truly have worked in my life. Isn't the ultimate purpose for all of us in this life to love and serve God first, then self and others without doubting? It doesn’t matter where you are or where I am in our journeys...what matters is that we meet each other in this present place to love, love, love and serve, serve, serve each other every chance we get without expecting any favors in return or any recognition or free pass into Heaven.

This topic also ties into my signature program: “Think / Feel / Do Lifestyle” that focuses on three primary areas of our lives – Self-Evaluation . Perseverance . Relationships. One Survivor’s Voice for Millions of Silent Victims.TM The “how’s” of my life follow…I evaluate every thought that I allow in. If it’s a negative thought, it leaves faster than it came into my mind’s space. I’ve built a habit, a behavior to always self-check my thoughts (negative or positive) with a 3 second rule because I believe for every thought that I ponder on more than 3 seconds in my head, there Basic RGBalso comes an emotion (positive or negative) tied to that thought that will dictate the rest of my day. It really does begin with ourselves, and what we think about, we bring about. If we continually think about our bank account and how it is lacking, it will remain in red. If we continue to think that we are unlovable, we will become what we think. Again, what we think about, we bring about, which comes from many new age faiths. You are the only one who can “design” your life, your “oola,” your awesomeness. You are the only one responsible for your happiness, not anyone else. It all begins with our thoughts and only we can change the way we think, which will then have a direct cause and effect in our lives.

Examples of other "how’s" that have worked for me in my awesome life is meditation, visualization of my heart’s desires, relaxation and quiet time to shut out the chatter of the outer world. 10302305_10152023084930493_3906921901192350204_nIt is then that the still, small voice (God) speaks to me. Other practices that work for me is walking in faith, surrendering my life to my Lord and Savior, staying in daily scripture, reading daily affirmations and inspirational quotes because what you feed your mind is who you become and truly changes the direction of your life.

One of my favorite scriptures is, "Therefore I say to you, all things for which you pray and ask, believe that you have received them, and they will be granted to you."Mark 11:24 (NIV). Praying at sunset

I am a living testimony that this is foolproof. You have the choice to be the “victor or victim” over your life. When you are broken, and you realize you are in the very bottom of the dark pit and the only way is up, it is then that you will see His face if you only look up and cry out for help. Even when you are self-destructing (in the wilderness of pain and suffering), it's your free will to stay in this place of darkness or you can take action and extend your hand to the one who has already been extending His right hand to pull you out of 1509817_313878868770013_5526318001510231972_na situation you fell into in the first place.

Another practice that has been very fulfilling and brought me great peace in my life is – daily scripture. Try this practice for the next several weeks and journal how it changes your thoughts, feelings and inner peace. There are 150 Psalms in the Holy Bible. Read 5 per day, 25 per week and 100 per month, totaling 150 Psalms. Also, there are 31 Proverbs in the Holy Bible, all of which God created to guide us, to help us live out a God-centric life, to be more like Jesus, our Lord and Savior, as he lived when he walked the earth. There are 31 Proverbs. Along with the 5 Psalms per day, read 1 Proverb per day. Journal your daily progregenesis crossss and your thoughts and emotions for 31 days. At the end of the 31 days, reflect back on your journaling notes and observe how your life has transformed. Observe your new thought patterns and even behaviors.

You will see a change all around you, others will see a change in you. You will lose friends, and you will gain enemies, but you will not be the same person you were before you started this new commitment in your life. There will be worldly judgment upon you. There will be mockers, mortal men and women who will try to crush you and degrade you because you are no longer the person they remember. Psalm 39:8 (NIV) says "Save me from my transgressions; do not make me the scorn of fools." But it is only because they can no longer “control” you like they could before you sought out a divine, loving relationship with the Lord. Jesus I cant live wo youYou have chosen a new life and since you will no longer be partying with these friends, they scorn you, mock you and believe you've gone off the deep end. They will try and pull out the sawdust from your eye before pulling the plank out of their eye. This is judgment and there is too much of it in this world. It is written, "The wicked draw the sword and bend the bow to bring down the poor and the needy, to slay those whose ways are righteous." Psalm 36:14 (NIV)

But more importantly, this daily scripture practice will draw you closer to God, and you will soon become thirsty for His word. "Delight yourself in the Lord and he will give you the desires of your heart." Psalm 36:4 (NIV) You will soon develop a loving relationship with God. I'm not talking about religion. Man Praying Holding the BibleI do not believe in religious laws and precepts. I walk away from “religion” because, like many, I have a bad taste in my mouth for something that doesn’t make me feel good, shames me and persecutes me. I refuse to allow any mortal person to control me through their religion or through their beliefs about how I should live out my life. I believe that my divine connection to God is through my relationship with Him. I believe whatever the “how” is for me to stay connected to God, and always be in a divine loving relationship with Him, is my testimony that there is no right or wrong way to walk by faith, to be in peace and to have a divine relationship with the Alpha, Omega, Jesus Christ, Lord of Lords, King of Kings, our Heavenly Father.

WomanAre you searching for peace, power, inspiration, laughter, fun, a good night’s sleep and a bright, promising dawn? As scripture says, "Let the morning bring me word of your unfailing love, for I have put my trust in you. Show me the way I should go, for to you I lift up my soul." Psalm 142:8 (NIV)

God Bless,

Debra M. Pauli

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Graceful Perseverance: A Cross at the Side of the Road

Posted April 26th, 2015 @ 08:04am

Welcome back everyone! This past week was my 3rd son's birthday (4/21). He would have been 31 this year, but is now celebrating his birthday in Heaven. Happy Birthday Bryce Lee. Mamma loves you son!

This week seemed appropriate to write about the cross at the side of the road, where a mother loses her son long before his time. Yes, for those of you who know me on an personal level, July 21, 2015 will be the 10th anniversary of Bryce Lee, my third son's return to Heaven.

Ten years has passed since I had written my third book in the memory of Bryce to help grieving parents and families cope with the many levels of pain that death's suffering leaves behind.

"Why we Cry for a Soul set Free" is the story of how I dealt with the death of my third child, one of the most traumatic experiences a parent can go through. Bryce Lee Haugen was the third of my four sons and the bravest human being I've ever known. Bryce was my special child; he had been diagnosed with epilepsy and mild mental retardation at a very young age. With his limitations, his life was a challenging one, but despite the treatment he sometimes received from those who couldn't accept or understand him, he always looked at life in a positive way and loved people unconditionally.

Aside from the book I wrote in 2005, there has been tremendous healing and transformation that has taken place in our family since that day. In this blog I am not going to write about the powerful message you get from my book because each of you can read the book and gain your own perspective. But what I did want to emphasize in this week's blog is the common practice of "no helmet" while riding four wheelers, motorcycles, dirt bikes, scooters, mopeds, any motorized vehicle and the important message I have for all of you, whether you are the driver or the passenger in any of these situations. Truthfully, Bryce was not wearing a helmet when riding his four wheeler, but if he had, I know without a doubt that he would still be with us today.

In this world there is such a heavy emphasis on "status symbols". What I mean by this is just this, we as humans consciously believe that the home we live in, what we drive, our job title, not the richness of our soul, but the richness of our bank account, the clothes we wear and who are social circle happens to be are all "status symbols" that we use to compare ourselves to others, to judge each other, and what we see as "important stuff" rather than "unimportant stuff". Actually because we get so fixated on the status symbols of this world our souls shrink and life becomes this big masquerade, and all of us us are simply "actors on stage" worrying about what our outside looks like, without concentrating on fixing the inside.

I've seen this too many times...if not most of the time. Bikers on Harly's who are pimped out in leather chaps, biker's gear that makes them look "cool" on their bikes - and every time it's without a helmet. Helmets don't fit into the dress code when riding a motorcycle because helmets don't make us look cool on our I wrong? This is a prime example of "status symbols" where we worry more about what we look like on the outside, rather than what we look like on the inside. And as a result of concentrating only on our outward appearance, we jeopardize our physical safety so we look good and impress others. And then when a tragic accidents occur such as Bryce's or on a motorcycle due to the fact that they weren't wearing helmets, everybody scratches their heads in awe and wonders how in the world something like this could happen.

Yes, my son was in a tragic four wheeler accident, along with two other vehicles on a major highway without a wearing a helmet. And the crazy part of that is everyone walked away without a scratch except for Bryce. Did he own a helmet? Yes, years prior to his accident I bought him one and insisted that he wear it. Did he wear it consistently when he rode his four wheeler? No. And the reason was because he was teased and made fun of by others when he did put it on. So again, my son was vulnerable to what society considers important - status symbols and looking good for others.

As a result of falling victim to the weight of the world, my son's life ended before his time. He died twelve hours later at St. Mary's Hospital in Rochester, Minnesota from a very horrific highway accident due to the simple fact that he was not wearing his helmet.

When the phone rang that July evening to tell me my twenty-one year old son was fighting for his life, my heart was shattered into a million pieces within seconds. While the rest of the world was sleeping peacefully, Bryce was fighting for his life. Despite twelve hours of intense medical attention by a staff at the Mayo Clinic and St. Mary's Hospital professionals, Bryce died from "cerebral edema with herniation" on July 21, 2005 at 6:30 p.m., a time that will be forever instilled in the memories of my family. We had lost a son, a brother, a loved one.

If you get nothing else out of my blog this week...please, I pray that all of you will take the initiative and enforce a helmet anytime you have the influence or authority with family and friends and even strangers...Trust me, you do not want to visit a cross on the side of a road or a cemetery in order to express your love to someone who has lost their life before their time. After the tragic that my family had endured, would you please listen to my words and the pain of my heart to please put on the helmets before's a choice that each of us has, and it will not only preserve lives, but will allow loved ones to remain here on earth without being forced to leave before their time.

Blessings until next week,

Debra M. Pauli


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